TOE-CURLING TERROR :"PANIC ROOM"

Ok, embarrassing confession time. I almost saw this film in cinema years ago. I walked out in the middle. It is one of about 3 films I have walked out of, because , a true film fan as it were, I am always curious as to what is going to happen in the end, even though the film is not “going well” for me. I remember I was with friends at the time; we all seem to have agreed… Although to be fair, I don’t exactly remember what our objection was. But at a guess, it may just have been that the tension just got to us. This, people, is one of the most “toe-curling” films I have watched in a very, very long time… But then again, with David Fincher at the helm, I honestly cannot expect anything less.

Newly divorced Meagan (Jodie Foster) and her sassy teenage daughter Sarah (Kristen Steward – otherwise known as Bella Swan, this was long before the Twilight saga of course) have just moved into their new home – and what a home it is too! Snapped up at a bargain, it is a three story house that once belonged to an eccentric millionaire. It comes equipped with all the mod-cons but also an elevator and a Panic Room. Now for those of us who didn’t know, a panic room is a high security room you can lock yourself in if intruders break in. There is no way in for the intruders and you have a secure line, not connected to the main landline in the home, you can call the police with. Except of course, if you are Meagan and forget to hook up the line. This does not come in handy at all when, on their first night there, intruders break into the house and Meagan and Sarah, terrified, lock themselves in the panic room. There are, however, two problems. Firstly, Sarah is diabetic and there is no insulin in the panic room either so unless they can somehow get out  and get to her medication, she will die. Secondly, these aren’t any old robbers who will just go through the family possessions and leave. They are looking for something very specific, and as luck would have it this thing is hidden in… You guessed it. The panic room.

As a side note, I just want to add that the intruders are played by Jared Leto, Forrest Whitaker and Dwight Yoakam (country music star and a damn good actor in case you hadn’t heard of him).  Now, if there is one thing Fincher is an absolute master of, it is thrillers. The tension creeps up on you so quickly and so inexorably, you are on edge pretty much from beginning to end, even in the sequences when you can pretty much guess what will happen next because, you know… I mean what if it doesn’t? This is compounded by Fincher’s mastery of the “in the meanwhile” type shots. You know, when you are told and shown, in various ways what two different groups in the film are doing at the same instant, that kind of thing always gives me the chills, especially if it is used as well as Fincher uses it. I watched this film as part of a personal project more than anything else and never, ever, in all my born days did I expect to enjoy it so much. It left me, as most Fincher films tend to, mentally exhausted and in need of watching something you know, simple. Easy to follow. Just to rest my brain – and my cardio vascular system. If you want a movie to make your evening fly by, this is the one folks – go right for it!

NOW IN CINEMAS - A NOVEL TAKE ON A CLASSIC: "SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN"

Now, you know how I was kind “meh” about the previous film? Well, I’m positively annoyed with bits of this one. I have a feeling that the blog may (only from time to time) turn into a place where I sit and gripe to you lot about what annoys me about films. I will not make a habit of this. And I will never put stuff that is so bad that I genuinely think you shouldn’t watch it. But still, why not be honest about bits you don’t like in something? That’s kinda what I’m doing with Snow White and the Huntsman.

Of course, Snow White and the Huntsman is the latest attempt to “revamp” the story of Snow White and the seven dwarves. I mean personally, I feel that the film is worth watching for this reason alone, I really like the idea of “what really happened” sort of versions of these things, I mean Cinderella has had her fair share of re-vamps, why not Snow White? I mean, here the basic tenets are all there. But in addition to the usual, Snow White does not “keep house” for the seven friendly dwarfs. She is “the chosen one who must save the land”. And when she comes back from the dead (she is not “asleep” like the fairy tale but actually dead here), she leads an army against the evil stepmother /witch and destroys her. Badass. Right?

Well, hmm, maybe. There are a few matters to be discussed though. First of all, Kristen Steward. I mean, no offence to the actress but I actually had to google her. No, to find out her real name. I thought and thought, and all I could come up with was Bella Swan. But there is the other matter of, well, she obviously isn’t worried about being typecast at all. Think about it, weak /normal and beautiful female character no one expects much of goes on to conquer hearts /become something super human and extraordinary / conquer hideous enemies. Fine, the second one doesn’t involve rather large wolves that are calling themselves werewolves. (I will not get started on Twilight. I respect everyone’s choice whether to like it or not but I will say one single thing : classic literature clearly states , VAMPIRES DO NOT SPARKLE IN THE SUN, THEY BURST INTO FLAMES. It’s my pet peeve about that series. Moving on).

Yes, so Snow White. It doesn’t take much experience in film analysis here to figure out that the Snow White here is very clearly a Christ figure. I mean she actually dies. And is brought back from the dead. Ok, there is true love’s kiss involved, but then the true love melts into the background, Snow White remains as white as snow as far as matters of the heart are concerned. It’s an interesting tack, but firstly it may be a little too serious for a film that is a fantasy film based on a children’s story. I don’t know, it just seems inappropriate somehow.

And then there is some stuff in the film that just popped out at me and my friend as we watched it. For starters, Snow White  is trapped in a tower for many long years until she comes of age. Then, her step mother must kill her to remain the fairest in the land for ever, when Snow White escapes and her adventure begins. The thing is, she is very athletic and able for someone trapped in a small cell for the best part of 15 years…  To the best of my knowledge, her muscles should have atrophied and stuff, no? Unless being “the chosen one” makes you some sort of exception. I mean this kind of omission of logic would be ok once in a while if it was tied together by this brilliant fantasy film that takes your breath away. And I mean there are some truly epic bits of this film (The bit with The White Heart for instance? I mean, Ok it has religious overtones but still... Pretty epic.). Oh and Charlize Theron is brilliant as the stepmother. Just awesome. But not as many as I would have liked. And a few too many of the afore mentioned errors in logic. I mean, suspension of disbelief is well and good but honestly, one shouldn’t push the matter.  Still, like I said, the concept is interesting. There are some seriously good bits. It’s a fun watch. Just watch it at home, on DVD with a couple of friends over. So you can point stuff out and gripe about it to each other J